Have you ever wondered why birds sing? They must be permanently happy! Do they have off days? Hate flying? Going from tree to tree looking for food? Fight with family and friends? Are they only happy when they are actually singing? Or are they happy at other times as well?

Happiness!... The one thing everyone is hoping to achieve, but never quite gets! Is anyone ever truly happy?

Have you seen how miserable everyone looks when they are travelling to work in the morning? Sitting on the tube / train / bus? No one ever looks up, catches your eye and smiles! Everyone trys to read or listen to their iPod nowadays, just so as not to interact with anyone. Mothers taking their children to school in the morning... no smiles! What's up with everyone?

I wish everyone would just make a concerted effort to smile. If you smile, you feel happier. Even if you force the smile at first, the ridiculousness of forcing it eventually makes you smile for real. Try it!

Just smile.

OK. Done that?

Now sing a song. Any happy song. Whenever you walk down the road, sit on the train / bus / tube... sing a song to yourself. Avoid love songs (unless you're madly in love!), and coochi mamma songs about sex and body appendages (unless you're a boy aged between 15 and 18... that'll really make you happy!)... what works best is nursery rhymes and silly songs from when you were happier (perhaps your childhood?). Now just silently sing it to yourself, smile (you've practiced that already!), maybe even hum it a little to yourself... feeling happy yet?

No?

OK, turn to someone nearby, look them in the eye (try it!) and really smile! They'll think you're a nutter, you know you're not, and that thought alone should make you happy.

Feeling happy yet? No?

Then get lost you miserable sod!!

And don't read any of my blogs again!!!

Boss just walked in... gotta dash!